Love You More: July 2012

As I sit here contemplating my place in life, there are four simple answers.

These precious lives that I have been blessed with...this amazing man (and funny, as you can tell) who shares his life and children with me...I thank God every day for them. Whenever I'm unsure about what I'm doing or where I'm at, all I have to do is look at them to be reassured that I am just where I'm meant to be.

I know I can't shield my kids from the world. I wouldn't want to. I always had an awareness of what was going on around me growing up, but my Mother raised me with enough of a shield that I wasn't blasted, but that I also wasn't naive. I pray I can do the same for my kids. I want them to be able to see the evils of the world, and take it in stride. See the beauty beyond the pain. I can still tell you exactly where I was and what I was doing on the day of 9/11. Often times when I hear an airplane overhead, I pause just to listen. Just to make sure. But I still fly. I still look at Muslims with the same respect that I do everyone else. I don't let one group of terrorists take away my spirit, and keep me hidden away from the world. I still wake up every morning thanking God that I'm alive. I pray I can instill that same outlook in my children.

Life is never sure. You could walk out your door and get struck by lightening, hit by a car, shot by a terrorist, or diagnosed with cancer. You could also walk out your door and experience everything beautiful. Smell the fresh air, explore new territory, meet new and amazing people, laugh and play, fall in love. There are so many possibilities in life. So many amazing ones. I hope I can, along with my family, always focus on those, rather than the bad.

"Be the change. Be the good. Be the heart. Be the soul. But most importantly, be the ones who continue forward."

I have this huge to-do list. It was started before I became pregnant, and once I knew baby was on board, my sporadic motivation kicked into high gear. "I'm going to super Spring clean my house, spend all Summer organizing and rearranging, and enjoy the Fall before baby gets here." I was going to do a million activities with the kids, have Nevaeh potty trained and toddler-bed-adapted two months before my due date. I was going to be freaking Super Mom on a whole new level!

And then reality set in. Reality as in, pregnancy. That magical time where my mind is on hyper speed with ideas and quests and must-do's, but my body renders useless. The first trimester? I slept. I am one of those lucky women who never gets morning sickness or any terrible symptom. I had a bit of nausea yes, but all I had to do was nibble on a snack and it was cured. But I am also one of those unlucky women who feels like they're one step away from a coma. I'll be the first to admit, it took all I had to get up with the kids, get them breakfast, and turn on cartoons before dozing off on the couch. I did get out with them; the zoo, Cosi, grocery store (hey, to a kid? That's a trip! Especially when Giant Eagle has those awesome race car carts!) We had out of state friends visit, and then took a camping trip with them the beginning of my second trimester. I definitely stayed active in between naps! (I also swore I'd blog regularly, because I want my kids to have a hard copy record of their childhood, along with all the awesome memories!....But that kind of went down the crapper too, now didn't it? Thank God for Facebook!)

So my list is far from completed. And it doesn't help that I keep adding projects, getting side tracked, deciding to skip housework and head to the Zoo or pool, or just being lazy and playing games with the kiddos all day long. But they are happy, I am happy, all are healthy and growing strong! I still have plenty of time to tackle everything that needs done :-) I'll sign off here with some highlight pictures from the Summer!